Psalm 130
A song of ascents.
1 Out of the depths I cry to you, O LORD;
2 O Lord, hear my voice.
Let your ears be attentive
to my cry for mercy.

3 If you, O LORD, kept a record of sins,
O Lord, who could stand?

4 But with you there is forgiveness;
therefore you are feared.

5 I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
and in his word I put my hope.

6 My soul waits for the Lord
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning.

7 O Israel, put your hope in the LORD,
for with the LORD is unfailing love
and with him is full redemption.

8 He himself will redeem Israel
from all their sins.

We used to sing a song in church, I've looked for the words and can't find them, but they basically said this.
'My soul groans within me, my soul it groans, it groans within me waiting for your hand to move.'
It has put me in tears more than once as I have prayed for one thing or another and had to wait on His hand to come and move people or circumstances or situations.
For a while, at the beginning of this year, worship music hurt for me to listen to, physically, like a fist to my chest. My hope was gone, and I had to turn my face away from His presence for a time. I had to step down from the role of watchman and rest. I was surprised how He understood that and still stayed close. I felt so weak, always on the edge. And yet it has been a time of enormous growth for me.
Today I heard some news that disturbed me and I felt drawn instead into worship to seek His face. I found myself cranking up the volume on the car stereo and singing out loud right there. Not something I usually do when there is someone else in the car with me. But I needed the comfort of turning my face to Him.
I was reminded again that what we do, whether we call it church or ministry or evangelism, whatever; it is all about Him. All about His power and holiness, His glory. Today I cried for making it about something else and forgetting that. That is where my hope is found. Hope for me, for my family, for my friends, for my church. In this crazy world that I live in called 'my life', He is my only hope. As the watchman waits for the morning, I long for Him to come and move His hand over us.

'He himself will redeem Isreal from all their sins.'

Amen Lord, amen.